Thursday, March 3, 2011

your time is tick tick ticking away




Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,

??


so much work to be done...commencing is the hard part
its becoming hard for me to do..anything at all.
When its not alcohol and wacky bits and pieces its endless smokeups and lying around aimlessly listening to the radio with the ball and chain for hours apon lazy hours on end.

Of-course theres time yet for everything, time yet to stress, time to really work and push myself...but i havent done so in so long ive almost forgotten what it feels like.

Its a pathetic situation,
In limbo between....this era and that
confusion is the key word.
What now?
I lost a friend the other day...she didnt die, just moved to Australia , one of the oldest Ive had...
Zoe Macken moved away on Febuary 28th , 2011.
To somewhere i cant follow, she has somewhere to go now, somewhere to be.

I suppose i also have somewhere to be...college, work but the gap in excitement and importance between her life and mine suddenly feels disturbingly wide.
Maybe its because i have no motivation, not really any ambition, nothing that leads me at all really.

Maybe Im getting no satisfaction these days because in order to be satisfied and happy there must first be strain and unhappieness ....after which comes relief?

without pain there couldnt be pleasure
no comfort without discomfort
no freedom without boundry?
yeah, that must be it...


I have to start working,
NOW

....after just one more episode of sex and the city....oh and download the new PJ harvey album


yeaaaahhhh ;]

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